I like two things animal style: burgers and schtupin’.  

This is another Sophbabe.  She’s super breezy and cuddly and shit.  The kind you want to devour, schtup, and watch The Sopranos with.  I bet pillow talk would be so radical. In real life, Sophbabe kinda smells like Vick’s Vapor Rub, but the kind that makes your balls tingle.  It’s really a mix of Gold Bond and schtup pheromones.  

Want to schtup but she had a thing with my neighbor, so that’s off.

I wonder if her boyfriend prefers Chritian Audigier or Ed Hardy? Look at her tattoos, she looks like a total slooze bag.  Wouldn’t schtup this cunt with Hugh Grant’s dick.  

WOOF!

Ali, Chase, Jenna - my hot babe friends (that I want to schtup) smoking in my shower, circa one summer during my college years. 

Ali is looking like she’d agree with anything Chase would say (it’s the ROOR workin’).

Chase looks like the leader of the pack.

And Jenna, well, she’s weirded out by the camera, or more so because she’s thinking about the time we made out once in the 9th grade…but it never got to schtup status.

(*Writer’s note: click on the pic to make it BIG).

Goose and Soph.  Totally and incredibly thought I could 3someschtup these cunts, but it didn’t happen.  Whateva.  Goose went on to boff some other dudes, which is all fine and good, but don’t think I’ma slide my cork into your Zinfandel anytime soon, ya stank ho.

From what I hear, these cunts can ride. They can ride.  They can ride.

Cocaine.

Jason Segel’s sister and Knecht4

In the words of MEAN GIRLS, “Boo hoo, you whore.”

Wanted to schtup both of you, oh well.

The fuck you mean you’re out of the La Scala chopped? It’s your trademark dish!

I just cant refuse it

Please dont stop the

Please dont stop the

MUSIC