Uh huh.

“Hey Rob, it’s K…”

“Oh, hey Bella…how’s your break comin’ along?”

“Awesome! I’m just, like, smoking weed on some yacht with this weird fuck, listening to some awesome jamz on my iPod that Joan Jett gave me.” 

“Brilliant.” [thinks to himself: I’m Rob Pattinson. I’m so charming.] ”Hey, Krissy, are you wearing that bikini I got you in Caicos?”

“Duh…

“Cool.”

“So, like wanna get high and fuck next time were togethskis?”

“Totally…also want to see the new Harry Pottah…”

“So I’ll see you at Comic Con?”

“Def.  I’m under the name Edward Cullen at the Ritz…”

suicideblonde:

Oh hey there, Kristen.  Morning, Dakota.  Hope you have a nice day filming.  

Man, you look either like you just got fucked and came, or like you are hooking up with whoever took this picture.

Chills.

thehottest:

cristiknows:

Kristen Stewarts takes her roles seriously

That’s the same exact face I make when I’m coming in my own hand at the thought of YOU.

I love you K Stewart.

In 3 years, when Twilight is over and you go back to being yourself, let’s go to Subway, get a sando, roast a spliff, and watch L.A. Confidential, k?

Let’s listen to that jam by YES that makes me want to get naked and start the revolution.  I bet you’d really like my mom.  She’s witty as fuck.

Gnite, baby.

Here’s the new photo spread of R. Patz and K “Fuck me a Jew” Stew from this month’s Harper’s Bazaar.

Quite frankly, I don’t dig her with the Dita Von Teese look.  I like her simple: brown hair, ray bans, spliff, motorcycle jacket and cotton panties.

On October 29th (mind you this is coming from what I read on Perez while high as Balloon Boy last night) Kristen and Rob spent the night at the Chateau Marmont in L.A. before seeing the first viewing of NEW MOON.  They enjoyed it.  Then they fucked, had a cigarette and ate bagels.

Hope they had Philly cream cheese, for otherwise, it was a waste of a perfectly good Jewish treat.

suicideblonde:

Taylor Lautner, Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson in the Entertainment Weekly, Nov 20, 2009

OR:

The Cherokee Injun, Wifey, and The Dirty Brit

suicideblonde:

Kristen Stewart at the New Moon premiere in LA last night

suicideblonde:

Kristen Stewart photographed by Craig McDean

I have this article/spread from INTERVIEW magazine on my bed.  I use it to roll joints on a nightly basis.  I love rolling on her. For Kristen is the best.

suicideblonde:

Kristen Stewart

I finally figured it out! I now acknowledge what it is that I love about her. It’s her eyes, but really it’s the way she stares off at anything other than the viewer of the photo when she is photographed. She never really looks into the lens, and even when she does it’s sort of irreverent. Her nose is like any other nose, imperfect at best. Nothing special there. The lips are deadly, however, and I always find myself staring at the ever so slightly down and up cruves near where her dimples would be.

She’s nineteen, man. That’s the other part of the attraction. Do you know what my main concern was at that age? All I thought about was where I’d get my next eighth from seeing as that I didn’t have a steady weed-guy. Finding quality trees in Boston is none too easy, ya digg?  You can’t just get it at Hip Zepi like everything else. She’d have conversations about nothing more than books, movies and music, her family, what she thinks about all day, and that’s about it.

Consider me content. ORiginal content (ya get it?)

“Harumph! I’m ready to get mah day started!”

Things I need to do today:

1) Reminder: Call Joan Jett and tell her that I need to comp the vox on ‘Cherry Bomb’ for THE RUNAWAYS. It sounded weird to me at the studio.

2) Subway. Five. Five Dollar. Five Dollar Footlong. The tuna there is phenomenal.

3) Call my agent at Gersh. Where the fuck is my check from NEW MOON? I got half up front and half after the press tour.

4) Mani/Pedi - black/black (I’ll settle for Vamp, duh hickey)

5) New Vampire Weekend album CONTRA is out today. Must swing by Sam Goody/FYE/Tower Recrods.

6) Run my Mini Cooper over my new Converse so they look worn in.

7) Remind Rob to wash under his scrotum. I don’t mind sucking his dick, but I do mind cheesedick/crotch rot.

8) Text Dakoty. I hope she’s settling in to Campbell Hall High School with ease.

9) GTL: Gym. Tan. Laundry.

10) Ugh, Taylor Lautner wanted me to go with him to Lady GaGa tonight. When is he gonna just come out already?

11) Buy a pumice scrub.