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About the author(s): MjH grew up in the suburbs of Encino, CA, born into a family of hilarious Jews. His mother, a witty New Yorker with a sharp tongue, set the bar pretty high in terms of what he looks for in a wife/Jewess.
Forever wearing glasses and on the hunt for Jewish cunt, our man wants you to know that he once schtupped a dame at DIVE! in Century City.
Copyright 2009-2011 BlackBerry Jew Squeeze
Coachella Time Lapse — pretty fucking saWEET.
Bummer about you East Coast kids, thinkin’ festivals like All Points East and Lolla are one-half what Coachiller is.
“It’s not about the drugs…it’s about the music.”
Except that some bitch at the Girl Talk portion in the Gobi tent came up to me hiding a cat in her purse and saying “omg, feel him!!!” This cat was FUCKKKKED UP by the end of the 3 day festival, I guarantee it.
Jigga Jay-Z
Them Crooked Vultures
Vamp Weekend
The xx
Public Image Limited
She & Him
Thom Yorke
Yeasayer
MGMT
Jesus Christ on Tamoubrine and Moses on Drums (kidding, assholes)
(The Ideal Line-Up)
** OMG I WANNA GO SO I CAN PRETEND I’M NOT 37, BALDING, FAT AND LAME! ALL THE KIDS LOVE PASSION SNOW AND MI.A.IKE SNOW. IS THEM CROOKED STONEAGE PLAYING?
WONDER IF AGNT WILL PLAY “KIDS”
Yeck. Coachiller madness makes me sck. See all you silly asshol3s in the Gobi Tent. If you were born before Nintendo NES dropped, DO NOT GO. YOU ARE NOT WELCOME.
So i think I’m gonna bail this year. I’ve been before, I’ve had an epic time, and well, quite frankly, my ticket connect didn’t come through and I’m too cheap (read: Jewish) to buy 3hundo plus hotel plus gas plus weed, ya dig. Oh, and Muse fucking sucks. They can open for me.
FURTHERMORE I need to finish this fucking book I started writing. It’s actually the coolest thing I’ve ever done…it just needs to be FINISHED!~
Surprise: It’s about girls, being Jewish, and trying to find a wife. I think I will take the time when everyone is at Brochella and finish this shit (read: masterpiece).
NO clouds in my stones, I hydroplane something something something Dow Jones.
Whoa! I’m alive! So much to tell you. So many pictures to upload. So much to overshare.
It was a blast. A great time was had by all. Thank you to my friends for being team players, sticking with one another in the sea of Caucasians bouncing up and down to “Can I Get A?” with Jay-Z, for fetching each other waters when a few were de-hydrated at David Guetta, and finally, for sharing gross but delicious Gyros with me at the Food tent before Dead Weather. Mean’s a lot, Oakwoodz 4 life.
It’s hard to believe I don’t have to buy dinner in a tent tonight.
My car wouldn’t start this morning as I tried to leave Indio. After 2 tow trips with AAA, a stop at SEARS Auto, a layover a Goodyear Tire and a short jaunt at Palms Springs BMW…she started. Celeste 2.0 whipped into shape and ignited for one more trip on the 10 —> 101.
Finally, thank you to Jonno, Carpool Zach, and Ramoney for sticking by me for two nights (and one horrendous morning after spent with road-side assistance crews) of what needs no blog post to recognize, enjoy, and remember.
**Also: sorry to uber-babe Molly, whom I saw on the way to my car at the end of Friday night post Jay-Z, after being shoved through a chain-link maze with 75,000 people, reminded of what it might be like in Nazi occupied Poland. I was too quick to get to my car with my sweat-soaked thighs and chaffed-tush to show her the attention she deserves. What can I say? I have no patience for anyone, even my friends, when my asshole is raw from sandpaper festival TP.
Drunk Guy Cant’ Get His Flip Flops on @Coachella.
Amazing!
Thanks, Jh2!
Coachella 2k10
Coachella sunset during the xx - 2010
Coachella 2010 - David Guetta (during…that’s not him above)
Farryn during Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Pretentious Zeros
