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Ask me shit! About the author(s): MjH grew up in the suburbs of Encino, CA, born into a family of hilarious Jews. His mother, a witty New Yorker with a sharp tongue, set the bar pretty high in terms of what he looks for in a wife/Jewess.

Forever wearing glasses and on the hunt for Jewish cunt, our man wants you to know that he once schtupped a dame at DIVE! in Century City.

Copyright 2009-2011 BlackBerry Jew Squeeze

There’s a reason I lost my Goddamned mind at college. There’s more spirit animal in one PICTURE of her than there is most female souls. 
It’s like my Jewish bro, Drizzy, said: 
I’m just such a gentleman you should give it up for me Look at how I’m placing all my napkins and my cutlery I can tell it wasn’t love I just thought you fuck with me Who coulda predicted Lucky Strike will have you stuck with me Damn I kept my wits about me luckily What happened between us that night it always seems to trouble me Now all of a sudden these gossip brags wanna cover me And you makin’ it seem that it happened that way because of me But I was curious and I’ll never forget it baby What an experience you coulda been the one but it wasn’t that serious Their was smoke in the air before now its me clearin’ it That felt good, all and all I learned a lesson from it though You never see it comin’ you just get to see it go Yeah, I shoulda looked up in the sky at first Now I can see it in her eyes Fireworks 

There’s a reason I lost my Goddamned mind at college. There’s more spirit animal in one PICTURE of her than there is most female souls. 

It’s like my Jewish bro, Drizzy, said: 

I’m just such a gentleman you should give it up for me 
Look at how I’m placing all my napkins and my cutlery 
I can tell it wasn’t love I just thought you fuck with me 
Who coulda predicted Lucky Strike will have you stuck with me 
Damn I kept my wits about me luckily 
What happened between us that night it always seems to trouble me 
Now all of a sudden these gossip brags wanna cover me 
And you makin’ it seem that it happened that way because of me 
But I was curious and I’ll never forget it baby 
What an experience you coulda been the one but it wasn’t that serious 
Their was smoke in the air before now its me clearin’ it 
That felt good, all and all I learned a lesson from it though 
You never see it comin’ you just get to see it go 
Yeah, I shoulda looked up in the sky at first 
Now I can see it in her eyes 
Fireworks 



Have a wonderful Yom Kippur, courtesy of Young Money. 
I’m about whateva, mayne
fuck what they be talking bout
Man, I love my team
I would die for mah jiggas OWWWWWW!

Have a wonderful Yom Kippur, courtesy of Young Money. 

I’m about whateva, mayne

fuck what they be talking bout

Man, I love my team

I would die for mah jiggas OWWWWWW!

(Source: thefyrp)



Drake

Makes me think of Blair.

Wish I had a best girlfriend that wasn’t my girlfriend. That might be my girlfriend. 

When homeboy lays those silky verses over R&B beats, I get all sentimental and nostalgic. 

Uggghh ok so I’m a pussy from time to time. 



Rihanna Ft. Drake - What’s My Name?

I know I know. I’m late to this party.

Whatevskis I like it.



[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

Drake - I’m On One

D

R

I

Z

Z

Y 4 P R E S I D E N T



@fennyfen — here’s some Drizzy with a broad for you. 

(Source: fuckwhattheytellyou)



[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

Drake - Headlines

!!!!!!??¿¿¿¿¿¿¿?????? NEW DRIZZZAAYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!



gq:

The GQ+A — Drake
Ever since Take Care, Drake’s third album (we know you think  it’s his second but he classifies So Far Gone as an album, not a  mixtape—and so do we, so kick rocks) leaked this week, the response has  been, well, massive. The Toronto rapper gave GQ’s Mark Anthony Green the back-story on the album’s title,  how it stacks up against his other albums, and the real meaning behind  some of your favorite Drizzy lyrics. The full interview is here. Below, Drake on his ongoing romantic struggles.

“The woman that I would try, is happy with a good guy.” Who’s the  girl you’re talking about?Drake: It’s not about one particular female. It’s just an  emotion that I’ve experienced. I’ve texted girls late at night saying,  “I miss you,” and she’ll be like, “I’m out on a date.” She is happy,  somewhere else.
GQ: Wait, you’re one of the top artists in the world right now.  That still happens to you, in 2011? Drake: Yeah, definitely.
GQ: What type of wildly successful girls are you dating to where  they’d dis you? Oprah?Drake: [laughs] I wish I dated Oprah. No, they’re mostly  girls from Toronto that know the real me and don’t give a fuck about  who “Drake” is or what he’s accomplished. And then there are a lot of  girls who get a kick out of doing that to me because of who I am. A lot  of girls want to purposefully drive a point home.

gq:

The GQ+A — Drake

Ever since Take Care, Drake’s third album (we know you think it’s his second but he classifies So Far Gone as an album, not a mixtape—and so do we, so kick rocks) leaked this week, the response has been, well, massive. The Toronto rapper gave GQ’s Mark Anthony Green the back-story on the album’s title, how it stacks up against his other albums, and the real meaning behind some of your favorite Drizzy lyrics. The full interview is here. Below, Drake on his ongoing romantic struggles.

“The woman that I would try, is happy with a good guy.” Who’s the girl you’re talking about?
Drake: It’s not about one particular female. It’s just an emotion that I’ve experienced. I’ve texted girls late at night saying, “I miss you,” and she’ll be like, “I’m out on a date.” She is happy, somewhere else.

GQ: Wait, you’re one of the top artists in the world right now. That still happens to you, in 2011?
Drake: Yeah, definitely.

GQ: What type of wildly successful girls are you dating to where they’d dis you? Oprah?
Drake: [laughs] I wish I dated Oprah. No, they’re mostly girls from Toronto that know the real me and don’t give a fuck about who “Drake” is or what he’s accomplished. And then there are a lot of girls who get a kick out of doing that to me because of who I am. A lot of girls want to purposefully drive a point home.



Conversations with The Other Matt about @Drake. 

Conversations with The Other Matt about @Drake. 



Ran into @Drake last night. He’s doing well. On an exercise kick. Said he hopes everybody is runnin’ on the treadmill only eatin’ salad. 

A very warm thank you to my partner in crime, @steveprinz for going HAM/Paramount Black Ops commando to make it happen for the team. Also, Kevin Connolly has a mustache.