Unlike the Lakers last night, I feel a need to go on the defensive. Not that many people have told me they don’t like what I do here…but more to get it out there just in case.

My least favorite words are fellate, schtup, and moist. I wince/vom sometimes when Matt posts especially nasty porny photos. However, my place on this blog is to be the chick counter to Matt’s dirty mind/rambling thoughts, therefore I get a little trashy with my language and posit questions that perhaps make me seem like a sex-obsessed rapunzel. False.  

The best way to make life easier on yourself is to have a sense of humor. And MAY I SAY that girls can talk dirty and make nasty jokes and say boner a lot and STILL be classy, kind, and intelligent. It’s 20fucking10 y’all. 

That being said, here’s a question, boys. I heard recently that the ideal girl is cute, pretty, and hot, both in terms of personality and looks.

CUTE is the girl you hang with everyday, who you can take to a Dodger game, who makes you laugh, who you adore when she has the sniffles and is in sweatpants on the couch. PRETTY is the girl who you are proud to have in the streets. She’s classy, she’s smart, she’s kind, your parents love her. HOT is just sex. From head to toe she always looks ready to get down and her voice sounds like a kitten drinking whiskey. I can think of girls who are all hot (Megan Fox) all cute (Tina Majorino) and all pretty (Michelle Obama?)

Do you think you’ve ever found a girl who had all three? If so, why’d you let her get away?!