thehottest: snakesandsuits: zooey deschanel I... -

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Ask me shit! About the author(s): MjH grew up in the suburbs of Encino, CA, born into a family of hilarious Jews. His mother, a witty New Yorker with a sharp tongue, set the bar pretty high in terms of what he looks for in a wife/Jewess/sport-fucking buddy. His father, a St. Louis cowboy at heart, reined him in as a child, only having to wash out his mouth with soap once during his early years.

Single, forever wearing glasses and on the hunt for Jewish cunt, our man finds himself thoroughly concerned with finding a wife, but more importantly, a bitch to lay with in the meantime.

Oh, and he wants me to tell you he he once schtupped a dame at DIVE! in Century City back in '01.

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thehottest:

snakesandsuits:
zooey deschanel

I used to work at a vintage store on Melrose Ave last summer, a very brief stint to make ends meet on the weekends.  The SHE & HIM album had just dropped and I was listening to it non-stop, smoking bowls during breaks, and slangin’ denim to the overpaid kids in America.
That was a nice period in my life, although somewhat ridiculous that I was working in the schmata business.

thehottest:

snakesandsuits:

zooey deschanel

I used to work at a vintage store on Melrose Ave last summer, a very brief stint to make ends meet on the weekends.  The SHE & HIM album had just dropped and I was listening to it non-stop, smoking bowls during breaks, and slangin’ denim to the overpaid kids in America.

That was a nice period in my life, although somewhat ridiculous that I was working in the schmata business.



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