That Jew there on the right — yeah, he’s been my... -

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Ask me shit! About the author(s): MjH grew up in the suburbs of Encino, CA, born into a family of hilarious Jews. His mother, a witty New Yorker with a sharp tongue, set the bar pretty high in terms of what he looks for in a wife/Jewess.

Forever wearing glasses and on the hunt for Jewish cunt, our man wants you to know that he once schtupped a dame at DIVE! in Century City.

Copyright 2009-2011 BlackBerry Jew Squeeze

That Jew there on the right — yeah, he’s been my personal hero since I was watching Sesame Street, shitting in my pants while going on and on about “Boot and Oonie” aka Bert and Ernie. I wanted to be him way before he was yachting with hot cunts in his Steve Zissou get-up. He also was the first dude I knew with Airwalks.  He also was the first dude to get me to smoke Djarums He also was the first dude I knew to lose his V-card He also had the flyest ride — a burnt Red Jeep He also taught me how to prank call/order pizzas to your enemies house He also taught me how to order porn for free in hotel rooms  We also rang up a $900.00 smoothie bill in Hawaii while in the 5th grade He can write circles around you He has a date just about every night of the week His name is Coozer Love him 4 lif3.  Sorta how Dre feels about Easy-E.  No matter what happens. Ride together. Die together.

That Jew there on the right — yeah, he’s been my personal hero since I was watching Sesame Street, shitting in my pants while going on and on about “Boot and Oonie” aka Bert and Ernie. I wanted to be him way before he was yachting with hot cunts in his Steve Zissou get-up.

  • He also was the first dude I knew with Airwalks. 
  • He also was the first dude to get me to smoke Djarums
  • He also was the first dude I knew to lose his V-card
  • He also had the flyest ride — a burnt Red Jeep
  • He also taught me how to prank call/order pizzas to your enemies house
  • He also taught me how to order porn for free in hotel rooms 
  • We also rang up a $900.00 smoothie bill in Hawaii while in the 5th grade
  • He can write circles around you
  • He has a date just about every night of the week
  • His name is Coozer

Love him 4 lif3.  Sorta how Dre feels about Easy-E.  No matter what happens. Ride together. Die together.


September 22
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