New Guy

My ex-girlfriend recently referred to the new man in her life as her boyfriend. Whoa! That was quick. Didn’t see that coming. Glad I have the shelf-life of a carton of 2%, or a package of string cheese at best. Writer’s Note*: (Must find out if String Cheese and/or Milk lasts seven weeks). 

****In all seriousness, I joke around because it helps, new guy. It’s hard to hear that your ex (or any ex for that matter) is entangled with another man (you) so soon out of the gate. She’s special. Treat her as such. Be good to her. Be kind. Consider her feelings. Open doors. Give her your jacket when she’s cold. Make her laugh. Take her out. Buy her dinner. Introduce her to your family. Make her breakfast. Kiss her all the time. Dance. Sing. Laugh. Surprise her. Maybe don’t watch so many episodes of The Sopranos on HBO GO when she’s in bed next to you. Send her flowers. Go down on her while she watches Gossip Girl (mainly so you don’t have to watch it yourself). Hold her hand. Make her Mix CDs. Let her use your Blackberry charger. Give her leather jackets. Take her on trips. Bring her coffee. Sing songs with her friends. More than anything, tell her how much you love her. She deserves it. *****